Exploring sexual connection with a soft penis
Frank talk about erectile differences
Inviting new conversations without shame
Millions of men around the world struggle in silence with erectile differences, and their partners are deeply affected. When it happened to me, the whole subject seemed trapped behind a wall of shame. Yet my own experience of erectile differences has opened the doorway to a rejuvenated, joyful, creative sex life that is much more of a full body experience than when it was dominated by erections.
Both my blog and my book offer more open conversations about erectile differences, and invite you to join in. While I encourage you to address any underlying medical issues with the appropriate doctor(s), my own contribution is not about cure but about thriving in your body the way it is. The book offers practical suggestions to adjust your mindset, re-engage in physical pleasure, and re-imagine orgasms.
Away with shame
Bring erectile differences out of shameful secrecy. Liberate full body sexual creativity.
Not a quick fix
No quick promises about “fixing this dick.” Enjoy sexual pleasure and intimacy with your body as it is now.
Full body pleasure
There is a treasure trove of pleasure awaiting those who use their whole bodies to make love.
Get the book now – available worldwide in both eBook and paperback
Read more book details and options here
Scroll on for the new Swell blog….
Expanding positive conversations about erectile differences
My vision for this website is that it becomes a home for conversations about how to expand sensuality and sexual pleasure without relying on hard erections. For too long many of us have been trapped by the hard boundaries imposed on male sexuality. Let’s talk about awakening loving connections – with ourselves and our partners, if we have partners. I imagine the conversation is particularly relevant for those with penises that don’t easily get or stay fully hard, as well as those who stay soft all the time, and their partners of any gender. It’s also definitely for those whose sexual pleasures are mostly or all solo. And it might be relevant to people who do have hard erections.
Note that this website and the book are not substitutes for professional medical advice. If you or your loved ones are experiencing changes in erectile function, they could need medical help and the person concerned should see a doctor. Take you partner with you – erectile differences affect both partners.
Why these conversations matter
Almost half of all men over 50 experience some form of erectile differences and disappointments, as well as a growing number of younger men. Reasons include medications, age, prostate cancer treatment, depression, diabetes and many other causes. The mainstream shames men with these conditions, and leaves tens of millions of men yearning for a quick fix. The public discourse is dominated by the notion of dysfunction, yet if it affects half of the men in the world over 50 isn’t it more of a normal change in function?
Your stories are welcome here.
About the author and website curator
I’ve enjoyed a robust and enjoyable sex life for more than fifty years, the last five of which have been mostly with a soft cock. The book has been shaped by my own experience and hundreds of candid, in-depth conversations with men and their partners over the course of five years, within and beyond the community that has grown around my Recovering Man website and global support group. You’re welcome here regardless of gender and sexual orientation and your differences are welcome.
This is an invitation for you to join the conversation, subscribe to the Swell blog, and bring some pretty normal male/AMAB body changes out of the shadows.
Introducing the new Swell Blog
Where you don’t have to be hard to have fun. And it isn’t always fun.
Adapting sexually to body changes
A Soft Cock Sex / Beyond Erections reader named Francois (quoted with permission) wrote this to me yesterday: I have long been aware that my body has drastically altered over the last year or two. To the point that I can say that I’m experiencing a 'crossing of a Body threshold’ akin to that of teenagers ... requiring a complete revision of the first hand experience, and the knowledge that there is no going back to the ease of physical ability
Infinite variety of orgasms
Orgasms come in every shape, size and form. This is more easy to appreciate by people who don't have hard penises. It also means that along with loss, there is something to gain for men when our bodies change. When we open to more possibilities, more possibilities can be unlocked in our relationships. I lived most of my life with hard, persistent erections and I love the pleasure they can give. Recently I have learned a lot about a whole rainbow